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  • Writer's pictureClaire A

PLEASE come tonight, my parents are coming and I don’t want them to think me pursuing comedy was a mistake

Hello out there!

My parents are coming to town today- and to DRULE TONIGHT! And they wanted to do what I do every day, how do I tell them that my usual Thursdays consist of hungover writing and panicking that I should be doing something more productive while watching The OC?

Did everyone watch the Superbowl? As a creative, I’ve found myself speaking to people all week who claim they “didn’t even know it was on,” which is what I have coined as a “Bushwick Brag.” If you say “oh yeah I didn’t even know who was playing” I just know that you probably dress like an extra in Saltburn.

I watched the Superbowl this year at my good friend Kelly’s house (shout out to Kelly I know you read the newsletter love you) and I had the best time I think I’ve ever had watching sports because the entirety of pop culture was on the line. I’m not a huge Taylor Swift fan- I did recently do mushrooms during karaoke while my friends sang her 10 minute long song (sorry Dad I know you also read the newsletter love you, mom if you’re reading this I’m joking and I don’t want to talk about it at dinner) and I felt a total parasocial connection to Taylor that I haven’t before, but other than that, I don’t care about her really.

I was just really excited to see what could possibly happen when the Cheifs inevitably won the superbowl- was Taylor going to blow him on the field? Was Travis going to propose? And I was terribly DISAPPOINTED. Again, can’t stress enough that I am not a football fan (I’m more of a poor artist kind of gay) or a Taylor Swift fan (Intense Swifites are just a few degrees below Disney adults IMO)* but I was utterly disappointed that after all that game, Taylor was just a supportive girlfriend. No show, she kissed him and said good job and whatever and I was like oh oops. I forgot maybe some people might just have normal relationships. Except they’re super rich. Do you think they make their private jets kiss?

I’ve never thought their relationship was real, and I don’t know if I do now either, but I do know this: I don’t care that much. If they’re just going to be a boring regular celebrity couple, I say let it happen. You guys go have your boring celebrity life and go to your boring parties. I wish you would cause drama and controversy so much because of all the power you have, but at the end of the day, some of us just want to be seen dating the popular football guy or the hot girl who has a ton of friend groups and that’s okay too.

Anyway, one thing that won’t be boring tonight is our HOT HOT HOT comedy show Drule with a VERY special guest, who I happen to owe thousands of dollars to: my dad!! I’m hopefully going to have him bring me up; it’ll be cute!

I love you all and see you tonight!!!


Claire bear

*stay with me, sorry


This week's lineup features:

VANNESSA JACKSON, @veryvannessa, Saturday Night Live

LIZZY CASSIDY, @lizzycassidy, Comedians You Should Know

JENAE BOSTON, @thatssojenae, MTV

MARISA RILEY, @notmarisa, Comedy Ugly

JESS ELGENE, @jess_elgene, New York Comedy Festival Creator to Watch

And your host, Claire Alexander, @clairebearpears, Reductress, The Hard Times, The Dump

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