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Writer's pictureClaire A

What? It’s our last show of 2023? You’ve gotta come!!

Updated: Dec 27, 2023


Tonight, Thursday, December 14th, 9 pm at 354 Metropolitan Ave, Brooklyn, NY 11211


Hi all!!

Well, this is my last hungover email I will be sending you this year, as we will not have the show the next two weeks, and I will miss you!!

I’m totally ready for the new year, not in a “I need a new beginning” way, but just in the way that I’ve been rehearsing saying 2024 out loud so that I won’t accidentally call it 2023 into March.

I used to never make resolutions for the new year, not because I didn’t think I could do them, just because I wanted the attention. It’s actually a great “pick me” behavior, because you don’t have to commit to the whole “pick me” lifestyle, you can just say “Oh resolution? Why do you ask? Do You think I need to change something about my life?” It has also been the only time I’ve ever felt rebellious. Telling people I’m going against the social norm by just staying exactly the same? Genius. Work smarter not harder if you want the reputation of a badass. What am I going to do anyway? Tell people I’m going to start going to the gym more? I start my resolutions at other times of the year so that I don’t get disappointed in February like everyone else does when they realize they can’t walk up a flight of stairs if they eliminate all carbs from their diet. That’s why seasonal depression really exists because everyone is sad they quit their resolutions. It’s true, I’m a doctor.*

The past few years however, I have made it my new years resolution to not drive a car. I keep breaking it every year, about six months in, I’ll be at my parents house in Connecticut and forget that we don’t have bodegas you can walk to, so then I have to get behind the wheel, and pretend I don’t feel like I’m playing a video game.

I’m thinking this year my resolution is no more condoms. I like lesbian sex anyway and I’m trying to save a little money!

Anyway, we’ve got such a fire show coming your way tonight to end the year with an absolute bang. I think we’re going to have so much fun and I can’t wait to see all of your smiling faces, and hear that you’re giving up on ketamine in 2024.

Love you so much, see you tonight, and then NEXT YEAR!

-Claire bear

*server at a restaurant (not doctor)

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This week's lineup features:

KATE WILLETT, @kate.willett, Netflix, Comedy Central

BRITTANY CARNEY, @brittany.goblin.carney, Comedy Central, That Damn Michael Che

TATIANA FRANK, @tatianafranknyc

DIVYA GUNASEKARAN, @divya_undone, Warner Brothers Comedic Voices

SARA BERGMARK, @sarabergmark_, Spicy Medley Comedy

And your host, Claire Alexander, @clairebearpears , Reductress, The Dump

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